Come As You Are

We are born naked, wet, and screaming. That's nature. That's the human experience. That's being alive. So half naked, dripping wet with river water, and screaming and laughing at the top of my lungs.... felt like the most human way to spend any amount of my time. Not that time mattered. Not that any of us were busy checking phones or watches. 

I quickly realized that running around in a bra and cowboy boots was easily my new favorite hobby. Because fuck clothes. And fuck makeup. And fuck wifi. Fuck showers. Bring on beer and watermelon. Fuck the sound of cars and traffic and bring on frogs and crickets (sounds I honestly had forgotten about). 

I learned that porcupines are actually a lot bigger than I thought. I learned that turtles have zero interest in eating watermelon. I learned that longhorns stand really, really still, for like, ever. I learned how to pee outside again (something I definitely haven't done in years).

And yeah, the old adage goes that you learn something new everyday, but sometimes, that can mean you relearn something. Maybe something you lost a while back. Like peeing outside. Or like actually taking a fucking breath. I relearned how PERFECT everything is. Everything everywhere. Even me.

 That one true fact was realized while lying on a rock watching the sunset with someone who refuses to see my imperfections (although I don't know how). I relearned how quiet the whole universe can be, if I get to the right spot, and if I give it a chance. I relearned the existence of stillness, of absolute calmness. Something that's seemed impossible as of late.  I think as young adults we can get so accustomed to the feeling of being stressed. Its like I didn't even realize I was choking until I finally caught my breath, on top of that awesome rock. I think I got a little too used to letting people telling me what I am, what I'm not, and what they want me to be. 

And fuck that.

Life isn't that bad. Life isn't that hard. It's gonna have its moments, definitely. But think of the things that drive you absolutely crazy. Think of the things that really make you feel like shit. Maybe its a situation, or a person, or maybe even both. Try to decide if you truly need it, and if you need it more than you need to breathe. Because if you've ever thought "this is killing me", then it really might, given enough time. And the point of life isn't dying. The point of life is, I don't know... breathing. Dancing under the stars, laughing like crazy, jumping into water. Jumping headfirst into whatever you want and not letting every little negative voice keep you from being the happiest version of yourself.